If I was god, I would have one rule and one rule only: Thou shalt not be a douche bag.
I once believed there was a finite amount of douche baggery in the world, shifting from place to place filling some sort of balance in the world. Anytime the some asshole blew up an abortion clinic it was there. Any time a politician got on his soap box to say just about anything, it was probably there. Any time someone put Richard Gere in a movie... well, you get the idea.
But as I observe the workings of the world I worry (something I am prone to do) that the douchiness is actually increasing exponentially. It's only a matter of time before it starts choking the life out of the most important endangered species on the planet - decent and considerate human beings.
I'd like to think it's not too late. I also suspect that there are enough non-douche bags to at least put up a pretty good fight if properly motivated. We probably can't change the world but we really, really need to.
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3 comments:
Problem is, all the non-douche bags watch Family Guy, wishing they were infact douche bags themselves. The Douchest Baggust Erectus is the guy good people wish they could be. Kinda sad.
Yo Bro asks:
But if there can be no douche bags, how exactly are women supposed to de-stink their hoohoos? Certainly you're not suggesting they all go a la française, are you?
Honestly who uses douche bags any more?
Except Corporate America.
Heheheheeh. I used douche bags in two ways. That's funny to me.
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