soaring through the blogoshpere

Why is actual news so hard to come by in the so-called information age? I am barely recovering from the all out suffocation of the Terri Schiavo coverage and now all I get is Pope, Pope, and more Pope.

I have nothing against the Pope, I think as far as religious leaders go he was A-okay. My concern is that I might miss out on other current events and news that happens might be important… who knows what sinister plots are unraveling as our attention is drawn—by the media—to the passing of a more than loveable guy who wore a funny hat.

Its times like these I turn to the only place left to get real, pertinent, unfiltered news…

The Blogosphere…

Here is what I learned today in the news…

Oli is a polish blogger who lives in Switzerland. He is currently instructing readers on how to say “Kocham Cię” or “I love you” in multiple languages. The only real news on this page is that the author, known to us a “Cool Oli” is (in his words) “COOL and INTELIGENT!!” He demonstrates this by listing his favorite artists as Brittney Spears and Celine Dion. I was going to comment that I was surprised that Oli didn’t mention the passing of the Pope (he is Polish, as every Pole I have ever met has informed me) but this sly dog updated while I was busy making fun of his blog...

My next stop was at a blog containing reviews of Australian brothels, escort agencies, independent prostitutes, sex forums, pornography, etc… The news here is that there is a blog about Australian brothels, escort agencies, independent prostitutes, sex forums, pornography, etc… and I only found it TODAY???? (in the words of Comic Book Guy – “Oh, I’ve wasted my life.”) This sight also contains sensitive ways on how one might suggest to the woman they love she needs a labiaplasty and laser vaginal rejuvenation… and who says the internet isn’t good for anything?

Elsewhere I learned that a person named Namaste just started a blog. In their (his/her) first and only entry, which briefly chronicles the trials of applying for colleges, they happened to mention that MIT was their fifth choice. Yeah. Their 5^th CHOICE! How cool is that?

I then found a blog by some jerk with the audacity to make fun of other people’s websites and blogs, suggesting a mean-spirited blog rating system and if I ever meet this guy I’m going to punch him in the face. For gods sake the guy uses enough ellipsis to make Larry King blush… oh wait…

Well, that is all the time I have for the news today. I hope you enjoyed your time here. If you have a blog and want me to make fun of it, you can contact me through this site or my e-mail address listed on my profile page. If you have a blog and don’t want me to make fun of it, please don’t read tomorrows update. If you think I suck and want me to die then you need to get in line behind Yale President Richard Levin and quite possibly Cool Oli.

As always, if you didn’t like what you read then go blog yourself.